More He, Less Me
“Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?”
Ah, yes, do you recognize the famous line from the classic Disney movie, Sleeping Beauty? When the wicked stepmother gazes into her magical, shimmering wall ornament she wants to hear positive affirmation. “You, dear queen, are the fairest of all!”
She is pleased…for the moment…because, for her, being the most beautiful woman in all the land is the highest honor she could attain. It is extremely important; her most prized possession. But, what the queen fails to realize is that true beauty consists of much more than outward appearance. It is more than what’s simply seen in the mirror.
For me, and maybe for you too, this is easier said than truly believed. I tend to place higher value on what is seen on the exterior than waiting to experience what may be found on the interior.
I’ve had a love-hate relationship with the mirror for most of my life. Being overly self-conscious of how I looked on the outside would summarize my teenage years. Like most girls that age I wanted to be seen as pretty to gain the attention of others…particularly boys.
However, my hair was never as nice as Julie’s and my legs weren’t long and thin like Marcie’s. What flaws were unnoticeable to others seemed to jump out of the mirror at me. All I could see was imperfection, and my self esteem was based entirely upon the approval of others. To be honest, it still is today to a lesser degree.
So when Pastor Ben delivered the message this past Sunday about being defined by Jesus, it struck a chord. So many questions to consider: What do I see when I look in the mirror? What does my presence reflect to the outside world? Do others see Jesus in me? Can I even get past myself to consider whether others can see Jesus in me or not? What is my primary identity…human Tara? Or holy Jesus?
Within each heart there is a desire to be admired. A desire to be known. A desire to be identified as special, unique, and maybe in some of us there is a desire to be the absolute best. Whether it is the “fairest” of all the others in your land, or maybe simply the smartest one in your class, we want this level of achievement to shine in the eyes of others. Maybe it’s always winning your tennis matches, being the most skilled gamer online, or maybe it’s achieving the top performer award in your industry…Whatever the situation, many of us look to external sources to give us our worth or define our value.
But Jesus doesn’t stop at the mirror. He digs deeper. He wants more for us! In II Corinthians 4 we see that God’s supernatural power, His light, is within every believer. He uses our frailty, weakness and “cracks” (our imperfections) to carry His message of salvation. We are seen by Him as treasures in jars of clay…His holiness fills us and replaces our insecurities.
So, our focus should be on our character; the evidence of the Fruits of the Spirit in our lives. In the Bible, we see Peter instructing wives: “Do not let your adorning be external…but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” (I Peter 3:3-4 ESV).
And, in 1 Samuel 16:7 the Lord says, “For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” We even read Isaiah’s prophecy of how Jesus himself would have “nothing in His appearance that we should desire Him.” (Is. 53:2) It’s who we are on the INSIDE that matters most to the Lord. And He wants us to live our lives in alignment with His holy example.
As a Christian, I am a Christ follower. And as Pastor Ben said I am a part of the church which is supposed to be defined by JESUS and His gospel. I am an example of Jesus to the world, and they’re watching. Wow. Ok, no pressure there unless the church (me) really grasps what that means. So, the questions I find myself asking today look more like this: Did I represent Christ in the way I interacted with the sales clerk who was rude to me? Did I speak words of grace when confronted by someone with opposing political viewpoints? Did I shine the love of Jesus to my husband and children when intense fellowship occurred in our household? Am I able to simply share a kind word in exchange for a rebuke?
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be defined by anything other than Jesus. Not the clothes I wear, the neighborhood in which I live, the car I drive, the school my children attend, even the church I call home should make me feel important. The only distinction I possess that is of any value is being a child of the King. Proverbs 31:30 tells us, “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” When we look into our mirrors we should see Jesus, not ourselves. We should want others to see Him, and not our own image. We should allow Him to fill our jars of clay with treasure that we can spill out for others.
~ Tara Dye is a longtime member of LIFE Fellowship. She and her husband Paul have three children.